We have all made mistakes, some are everyday little ones and others were so big you shake your head when you recollect them. Whatever were you thinking of to do such a thing? Do you feel guilty or ashamed about what you have done?
Children, legally and through common sense (which at times is not too common), are not permitted to do certain things such as drink alcohol or drive a motor vehicle. This is because they are immature and inexperienced. When they experiment with things they shouldn’t, and consequently make mistakes, we correct them, but at the same time accept they are young and are bound to do things wrong.
I have been blessed with a fairly high IQ (in the lower end of the genius range, I say modestly) which helps me to grasp and remember things. It did nothing, however, to prevent me from doing some incredibly stupid things in my life – things I should have felt truly sorry for, but the person I was just didn’t give a damn. I was so locked in to me and mine that I could not see we and ours. I was immature in many ways and totally inexperienced in matters of relating to others.
Like many people, my focus was on building a protective wall around myself to prevent others from hurting me as I had experienced in the past. My world was a lonely, suspicious and angry place.
Can you see why I did hurtful things to others? Can you forgive someone for doing stupid things because they could see no other way of doing what they had done?
Many people see the world the way I did and have little understanding of love, respect or honesty. Given these shortcomings, they get by as best they know how. The blazing mistakes and hurtful things they do are because of what is going on in their heads at the moment they did them. Perhaps moments later they might regret their actions, but at the moment they took action, they were doing the very best they could.
When I was young, I got away with things I should have gone to prison for – things I am not proud of. I now understand that the person I was was doing the best I could at that time. I forgive myself. In doing so, I must accept that everyone else is also doing the best they can at any moment in time. I forgive them as well.
We are still responsible for our actions and should accept the consequences, but we need not live a life of shame. The person I was lives deep in my past and taught me valuable lessons. I am grateful to him.
Take a look at the mistakes and misadventures of your past and reflect on how they still affect the way you live your life. Do you have insecurities haunting you, holding you back? It is time to let them go.
When you make a mistake, don’t look back at it long. Take the reason of the thing into your mind and then look forward. Mistakes are lessons of wisdom. The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.”
– Hugh White (1773-1840)