How often is frustration a problem for you? What brings it on? How well do you handle it?
Frustration is triggered by an inability to understand something, to be able to achieve some goal, or to deal with certain challenges. The more importance one places on being unable to do so, the greater the challenge becomes. Sometimes the frustration is in not being able to do what others are doing, and at other times, it is in being incapable of accomplishing what use to be quite routine.
Not being able to achieve what one wants is merely annoying for some people, for others it triggers anger and even rage. It can become a time to react to everyone and everything with swear words, angry outbursts or to physically react in some manner. The latter is standard operating procedure for many.
How do you handle it?
The Real Reason for Frustration
No, it is not because you are surrounded by incompetent idiots. You well might be but that is not the cause of your current frustration.
No, there is not a grand conspiracy to highlight what an idiot you are. That is just your low self-esteem talking and it only talks to you. Everyone else is focused on their own problems (of why they are idiots).
No, it is not because you are just unlucky. Luck, or the lack thereof, has nothing to do with it. You create your own luck. Energies and influences vary from day to day but it is still up to you how you respond to them.
Yes, it has to do with the manner of how you have reacted to challenges in the past. You routinely respond in the manner you are accustomed to.
Yes, it has to do with your perspective of the situation. Where your attention goes, energy flows. We are all faced with challenges in life. It is through them that we learn. If you view your challenges as impenetrable obstacles, you will definitely be frustrated in your attempts to deal with them.
Suggestions for Dealing with Frustration
I recall a day many years ago when I was working on a home handyman project. I had both the right tools and experience to handle the task. In spite of that, things just did not work out. Twice I measured carefully and re-checked my measurement but when I cut the board, I cut it short. Nails bent when I hit them and other things went wrong. Finally, I got the message that God or whatever was poking fun at me.
I put all my tools and building materials away and went for a ride on my bicycle. I managed to get a block away from home when a dog ran out and bit my ankle. Accepting that it would continue to be one of those days, I limped home pushing my bike and spent the rest of the day safely engrossed in a book.
There are always lessons to learn from life experiences even if they don’t seem readily apparent. Here are a few to ponder:
Take a break from what is frustrating you and take a few deep breaths. This sends more oxygen to your brain which helps you to relax, think more clearly and to remember things better.
Consider, as I related from my experience, that this just might not be the right day to tackle your problem. When you come back to a situation, you often see things you missed previously.
Accept the fact that the only person you can change is yourself. We don’t really understand why others do all the things they do or whether they are having a bad day.
Swallow your pride and ask for help. Yes, I know it is hard to reach out to others but sometimes it is the best move. Perhaps the opportunity will come for you to help them back. People like to be needed.
Don’t make the situation worse than it is. You will get through this and, in time, it will be forgotten. Consider it an inconvenience or a nuisance. It is not worth obsessing over and making yourself unhappy.
“Transformation is my favorite game and in my experience, anger and frustration are the result of you not being authentic somewhere in your life or with someone in your life. Being fake about anything creates a block inside of you. Life can’t work for you if you don’t show up as you.”
― Jason Mraz
For those of you who have missed my recent posts, I have experienced major computer problems which prompted this theme. I am back.